Woken up by a dream.

I know it's late but a interesting dream has woken me up, in more ways then one. Last night and all day yesterday I was having a emotional breakdown. My life has hit a point where things are starting to go bad. Umm... let me explain:

My current situation includes me not being able to find a job, and most of all worried about my sick grandmother. She has been going to kemo since her diagnose of lung cancer. It's hard to see her so tried and depressed but I know she is trying to do her best.

Well, about the dream (and i'll keep it short and to the point)... It starts with Will and I going to an amusement park late in the evening. As soon as we get off the car I rush to the nearest ride I see, losing Will in the process. I enter the ride car not noticing that it was out of order. The doors shut and I'm off to what seems like a fast, dark, outta of control monorail ride. At first it's fun, but then I noticed that I have passed the same landmark over again. The control car is empty and it is very dark. Some how I get the courage to try to control the thing. Quickly I slow and hit the breaks. I exit in a populated area, and Will is no where in sight. Some friends are near by and I ask them for their help. They know where he is and take me to his location. As we approach I see him franticly looking for me. I then run to him to be by his side.

What does this mean? Well, it has made me realize that the only way I can make things better is to do it alone. I have to take control of the situation and save myself and when I do Will is there waiting for me. He has been trying to help me as much as he can but in the end I have to be my own hero.